BXBX NOVEL Chapter 22.56
“What do you want to do?”
“I… I want…” His ice-blue eyes tremble. He keeps opening and closing his mouth like a fish.
As if he is trying to reach out his hand, but after thinking it impossible, gives up.
I sigh.
Lian always tends to give everything he owns willingly to other people. But he rarely wants to receive anything from anyone. Until that person forces him to do so.
Lian is too generous. But if one were to look at it from a different perspective, he doesn’t seem to have any attachment to those items, like he’s already given up on owning them from the beginning.
“What do you want to do, Lian?”
If you, who has never wanted anything before, actually want me…
I will be so happy that I can even run around the entire town. So I want him to answer this question no matter what.
“I…”
“Do you still want me to stay by your side?”
Lian doesn’t give a verbal response, but the way he grabs onto my shirt tightly is enough of an answer.
As I peer at his face, Lian looks up, eyes still wet with unshed tears.
As I bring my face closer to his, he closes his eyes. He doesn’t run away, even when I press my lips against his.
Seeing his compliance, I grow bolder. I tighten my embrace and bite his lips, but even then, other than a twitch, he still doesn’t show any resistance.
Can I take this as his answer to my question?
I feel like it is, but…
Why won’t he just tell it to me straight? I mean, we’ve already reached this point.
Is there a big block in his heart preventing Lian from doing so?
I want to confirm this, to see what it actually is, but if I try to do so, he’ll most likely run away from me. Then I won’t be able to ask him anymore.
I deepen our kiss and slip my tongue inside his mouth again before entangling it with his. He jolts in surprise, eyes snapping open. But he soon clings to me obediently, eyes fluttering shut.
“Hey. What do you want me to do?”
Lian slowly opens his eyes and lifts his head to meet my gaze once more. Those blue orbs quiver. He looks lost, or anxious.
“Lian.”
“Stay… by my side…” he says, low and trembling. If I haven’t been straining my ears, I would have just missed it.
Lian casts his gaze down and holds me tight. He breaks into a sob, yet suppresses his voice.
Just like that time.
“Ok, I got it. I promise to stay by your side forever… Lian, do you really like me?” I just want to confirm.
But as I thought, he never answered me with words.
On purpose, I bring my face close to his. To which Lian slightly raises his head and closes his eyes in response, tears still spilling from them as he receives my kiss.
His trembling arms circle around my neck. Timid like a newborn chick.
A meagre gesture, but this counts as his reply, as a substitute for words.
Now I’m sure it’s not just my imagination. He likes me.
This I am most certain of.
Lian’s words, as well as those from the black-haired woman when she had read the stars, come to mind.
Even though half of me still thinks that it’s stupid and impossible, the other half is starting to believe them.
Lian is probably aware of it. Just like that star-reading woman.
About what will happen in the near future.
I don’t know anything about the future, nor do I have a way to confirm what would occur.
But if Lian does, then he must have felt trapped in a cage…
When you manage to get rid of the future problem, will you finally answer me in words?
If you want me to wait, then I’ll wait for as long as it takes.
Until then─
“Will you stay with me forever?” I ask, as I let go of Lian.
Lian’s eyes open wide, and he fixes his gaze on me.
“I will stay with you forever. So you should also stay with me forever.”
His eyes once again grow moist, tears flowing down his cheeks. He lowers his eyelids as if troubled. Even so, he flashes a slight smile, looking somewhat happy.
“I will stay with you for as long as you wish for it.”
His reply is very much like Lian. Reserved and undemanding.
I’m not asking him to learn from that trio he’s always with, but I hope he can be a bit more selfish from now on.
“As long as I wish for it…”
If you plan on staying by my side for as long as I want, then… “Then stay with me my entire life.”
“Ha? Y-you… What do you mean your entire life?”
“Stay by my side for my entire life.”
I want you to revolve around me for the rest of my life.
If you are my star, the star that thinks about me and revolves around me…
“Stay by my side forever, until I’m no longer in this world.”
I give him another kiss, bringing his smaller and thinner body back into my arms.
He still doesn’t reply, but he slowly wraps his arms around my waist, grabbing onto the back of my clothes.
I heave a small sigh, tightly embracing his trembling body.