主妇丈夫倡导的户外生活

Chapter 4 Of Systems And Cultivations



Drip….. Drip…. Drip….

It\'s all he could hear.

Drip… Drip… Drip….

The dripping sound echoed like the sound of raindrops on a well. He can\'t register much of anything else besides passing shadows, wild shapes and hushed whispers.

Eventually, the shadows converge into the image of a woman looming over him.

".... a while since I ate a virgin."

His mind was too cloudy, but he held onto that word. Virgin. Is this what this was about? Demons, witches and all kinds of crazy occult stuff love virgins. Goddammit, will he die because of being a virgin?

"Mother said not to feed….. Full moon night…. The Omniscient One is watching…"

He creased his brows a little, wondering what the hell was she talking about. She continued to talk to herself while undressing.

Before Harker could fully gain consciousness, the pain hit him over and over like a truck going forwards and backwards to crush him. His whole body felt like it was screaming. There was ringing in his ear.

It turned out that his bones had been crushed by the strands of hair constricting him. Her hair was soft and smooth like silk. It smelled like that flower he couldn\'t recognize.

The dripping sound was his own blood spilling all over as he was being stretched out and teared apart at the limbs.

But that\'s not all.

It was also the sound of Xi Hua\'s blood dripping over his body. The blood from her head wound when he slammed her against the wall. His skin was now painted crimson.

".....Delicious…. Can\'t resist….. Take a bite…."

As she leaned down, his blurry vision could only glean on that cherry-red smile. A long forked tongue slipped out of it, causing him to squirm.

Then…..

There was nothing but a blackhole.

A vast expanse of darkness that was swallowing him, leading to nowhere.

But as he faced that expanse, he also felt the crimson drip over his lips. Drip… Drip… Drip…

The blood went straight down his throat.

After that…..

Nothing.

But now that he was awake, all these vague details served as clues to what truly happened that night.

------------------------------------

"Ack….." Harker massaged his jaw.

His memories started to fill in the blanks. The headless body remained by his side, and he was still caked in that old, murky blood.

But the wounds he was supposed to have were gone, and Xi Hua\'s hair was no longer binding his limbs.

That blackhole he saw….

"That was Xi Hua\'s mouth. It unhinged like a snake and tried to swallow my head whole." He muttered to himself.

But somehow, that didn\'t happen. After he accidentally drank her blood and blacked out again, something must have caused her to be the dead one instead.

His senses felt sharper. The stink of the blood and dead body was much more pungent. But besides that, his vision was also clear. He felt wide awake, like when you have been splashed with cold water.

Only that the effect never goes away and stays forever.

He felt more alert and energized than someone that just injected their veins with an energy drink or something. And because of this, his mind quickly came up with problems in his current situation.

"This is really bad…." He rubbed his face, looking distraught. "I have to move fast. If someone comes here—"

"You have awakened, my Lord!"

Harker jolted at the voice. He panicked and thought it must be some staff at the hotel, and they would witness all this carnage.

But when he looked around, there was nothing.

It couldn\'t have been Xi Hua either, as it was a masculine voice.

Plus her body was completely stiff under rigor mortis, so she must have been dead for over 6 to 7 hours now. The sun outside indicates that it must be almost noon, so it was right to estimate that she had died last night. Harker had studied rigor mortis and everything that happens to the body after death in his Biochemistry classes, though mostly through frogs and lab rats.

Harker looked everywhere for the source of the voice—

"Up here, Master."

It was…..

A giant eyeball with bat wings.

"Oh hell no... I\'m not dealing with more demon shit today! I barely survived one last night!" Harker quickly grabbed the nearest object he could find.

It was a wooden bed lamp.

"Don\'t come any closer or I\'ll strike you with this!" He threatened.

The eyeball laughed. "Haha, that lamp doesn\'t really look threatening, Master. The blunt force would not be enough to kill me—"

SNAP!

Harker broke the shaft of the lamp, turning it into a piercing weapon. A wooden stake.

"You were saying?"

The eyeball quickly changed tone from mysterious to nervous.

"Hey, now, my Lord! No need to get violent! I\'m a good eyeball, I swear! Very good eyeball!"

Harker kept his grip on the makeshift stake firm. "There ain\'t no good demons. Fly out of here if you don\'t want to be like an olive in a skewer!"

He stood up from the bed and started swinging the stake towards the flying eye!

"W-Wait! But I can\'t just leave the new lord behind!" The eyeball tried to dodge his quick movements, "Time out! Time out!"

"This ain\'t a baseball match to ask for time out!" Harker continued to go straight for this eye\'s pupil, surrounded by deep red iris—

"I killed Xi Hua for you! And healed your injuries! So please calm down!"

Harker stopped at this.

"What did you say? You were the one who saved me?"

"Er….." The eyeball sounded unsure. "That\'s only partially true. You saved yourself, I only helped with the damage you received. You really don\'t remember what you did last night?"

Harker was frustrated. "That\'s what I\'m tryna figure out \'ere! How did I stay alive while this demoness Xi Hua gets decapitated all of a sudden!?"

"Well…. That\'s because you ate her."

Harker blinked. "Huh?"

"You ate her head just when she was about to eat yours."

This did not help his confusion at all. What was this eyeball demon talking about…..

But then, he remembered the dripping crimson blood to his mouth. It did something to him. And that pain in his skull and his jaw…..

His eyes widened as his tongue suddenly slipped out, and it was a long, thin forked tongue!

"Sweet mother of corn!" He exclaimed in shock.

Then, he tried to open his mouth as wide as he could…..

And on the vanity mirror, it showed how it unhinged and revealed that black hole just like the one he faced last night.

He can unhinge his jaw like a snake! Talk about a real \'jaw-dropper\'!

The eyeball spoke in a cheery tone, even when it doesn\'t have a mouth:

[Greetings, new Demon Lord of the West! I am your humble assistant, Yan. Let us now determine your cultivation type!]

A hologram screen appeared beside the talking eyeball.

Harker\'s right eye twitched. "What the heck is this? I thought this is supernatural horror, why is the genre changing all of sudden into sci-fi with holograms like in Star Track?"

[DING!] The eyeball said out loud. [System has determined your cultivation type. Your type is:]

The screen suddenly showed a bunch of 0s and 1s, and then it turned into 4 words.

[Shapeshifting through DNA Absorption!]

The eyeball, Yan, announced it like something to be celebrated. All that was missing was fanfare and party poppers. But Harker\'s eye just twitched in confusion several more times.

"What in the blazes is \'system\' and \'cultivation\'?"


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