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Chapter 264 - Not Worse. Special.



He cleared his throat before saying, "You don't have to. I can manage pretty well."

"If you say so." She gestured to him to enter her place and after doing so, she closed the door behind her.

After Si Hongqi had put the things he bought in the kitchen, she hurriedly went to his side. "Let me prepare the hotpot for us. Why don't you just sit on the sofa and watch something? I have snacks, you can have some while you wait."

He raised a brow at her as she tried to push him off out of her kitchen. He inwardly sighed. "I'll help you. Don't you think it would be faster for us to prepare the hotpot by working together?"

She pursed her lips at him. "But you are my guest."

"And also your friend."

"Are you afraid that I might end up poisoning your food?" She huffed.

The man became quiet since he was rather surprised that she remembered that he didn't like having someone cook for him. "No, it's not that."

Somehow, Tian Ruyi felt relieved upon hearing his reply since for a second there, she thought that he didn't trust her despite being friends with her. 

"You can just watch me then. I'll prepare a delicious hotpot for you." She flashed him a grin.

In the end, Si Hongqi didn't have a choice but to let her do what she wanted to do. He sat at the stool by the counter and began watching her every move from heating up the pot to preparing the dishes. He noticed how Tian Ruyi had dressed conservatively. She was dressed in the most basic two-piece pajamas. Her jade-like complexion had a natural flush to it, despite the fact that she wasn't wearing any makeup. Her hair was tied into a high messy bun. The moment his eyes landed on her slender neck, he couldn't help but slowly gulp down the saliva from his mouth.

Si Hongqi had seen countless beautiful women. Tian Ruyi may not be on par with them but something caught his attention that he couldn't put a finger on what it was. She was small, like a bunny. A harmless herbivore but… he knew that this herbivore could be brave too. 

On the other hand, the more Tian Ruyi felt his stares at her, the darker her blush became. She felt so conscious and embarrassed. She wanted to dig a hole and hide so when he offered to help her again, she decided to let him. At least in this way, he would be distracted by something else.

Si Hongqi helped her in bringing out the prepared ingredients, then putting out two sets of chopsticks and bowls.

As they began to eat, Si Hongqi paused and raised his beer to her. "Congratulations."

She ended up blinking up a few times in confusion. "For what?"

"Surviving."

"..."

He cleared his throat to regain his composure. "What I mean is, congratulations for coming back alive," he added.

"..."

Was that supposed to comfort her? She smiled a bit and lifted her beer to clink his glass lightly. "Thank you I guess?"

After chugging down her drink, she continued to eat while Si Hongqi would cook some more meat before placing them in their bowls.

She looked at him, blinking a few times. "This…"

"You're so skinny. Eat more." 

Her lips were stretched into a thin line. "Just so you know, I need to be skinny for my work."

"I don't like being with girls whose bones are just covered with skin." He placed some vegetables in her bowl this time.

"..."

"Eat up." He continued to eat, acting like his usual self.

Tian Ruyi didn't know how to react to what he said since he had never encountered a person who straightforwardly commented about eating more, except for her father. 

"Losing weight is a must when it comes to the entertainment industry. Besides, it makes us women feel more beautiful. Also, I need to lose weight for my job, that's why I'll start my diet tomorrow,' she said before she continued to eat the food he gave her.

"I don't think a woman's beauty will change because of weight. If she's beautiful, thin or fat, it will still be the same in the eyes of the people who love her."

"Then are you saying that you love me? Is that why you're concerned?" She grinned jokingly at him.

Si Hongqi came to a pause as he felt his heart skip a beat. Why did it suddenly jump?

Seeing that the man before her became expressionless, Tian Ruyi quickly said, "I'm just joking. Just joking. Don't take it so personally."

Si Hongqi remained still, and the longer he stared at her, the narrower his eyes became, making the woman feel uneasy.

"A-Anyway, as I was saying earlier…" she paused as she averted her gaze from him, returning them to her bowl. "For a long time, we women have always had our own beauty standards. It varies from one culture to another. Such differences in beauty ideals frequently mirror the responsibilities that women and men are expected to fulfill in a given society."

He chuckled a bit, shaking his head in disagreement. "So are you saying that attractive women are more likely to succeed?"

"That's…" she paused. "That's the harsh truth of the society we are living in."

"That may be the case but people have flaws and I think it's normal. Don't you think having beauty standards only worsen things? It gives a person insecurities. Depression. Anxiety. Instead of loving themselves, it would only make a person hate themselves if they didn't fit any of those standards."

She slowly lowered her chopsticks on the side upon hearing his words. She had always felt so insecure about her freckles that she had always thought of wanting to remove them. She had always hidden them under her makeup. 

"Acne, a gap between someone's teeth, freckles on your cheeks or shoulders, or any other distinguishing traits should not be blamed on you or to others. Are you able to grasp the thought? It doesn't make you feel any worse. Not worse. Special." He had already seen her bare face and shoulders once. It was during the time when he brought her to his place and wiped her clean. "I find someone the prettiest whenever they appreciate their shapes which are not really perceived by our society. Don't you think it's rather sexier to watch them break the stereotypes around them? It would be rather amazing to see such women be the start of change."

Tian Ruyi never thought that Sii Hongqi was a person with such ideals. It only made her fall deeper for him. It was as if she was seeing a whole new side of him. He looked so passionate the more she watched him say those.

"Well, I guess it might be hard especially for those who work in the entertainment industry but when you're striving to be better for someone else, you'll only end up feeling bad about yourself." He placed another piece of fish cake in her bowl. 

"You may be an entertainer, an artist, or whatever you want to be but they don't deserve you anyway if they don't love you the way you want to look. You shouldn't change anything to be cool. That won't go over well with the general public. They'd keep asking for more and more till you'd lose your mind. A girl should be two things: who and what she wants no matter what kind of work she has."

"If you keep on saying more, it will be harder for me to control my feelings…" she whispered to herself which he was not able to hear.

"Hm?"

"Do you think I look prettier with my freckles on?" She asked before she continued to eat the food he had given her. Tian Ruyi already knew that by now, he probably had seen her freckles already.

Si Hongqi paused to stare into her eyes. With a soft gaze, the side of his lips curled up as he replied, "Mm, prettiest."

She felt her cheeks heat up again upon seeing such a lovely smile plastered on his face. It was the most genuine she had ever seen from him. She shifted her gaze away from him and began chowing down her food.

"Adorable too," he added, under his breath, which she was not able to hear.. He remained to stare at her for a few moments longer before continuing to eat.


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