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Chapter 213: Past Life and Present Life



-You really like socializing, don’t you? You admire the social big brother so much. How about I find a disco for you to check out?” Xiao Qian said to Chen

Zilong.

Chen Zilong immediately begged for mercy. “I surrender, sister. Can I just study well?”

Xiao Qian hummed. As she calculated, Chen Wanku of the past had caused numerous troubles by now, making her marry the scumbag without a chance for divorce. However, after being taught a lesson by her in this life, he had been behaving and not causing any trouble.’

She commanded him to move his luggage upstairs.

Where did mom go?”

“To a village meeting. Sister, many people have been coming to our house and the surrounding area lately, carrying tools and measuring. What’s going on?”

People were measuring with tools?

Xiao Qian slightly organized her thoughts and immediately widened her eyes!

“Sister, what’s going on? I heard it might be the relocation office, but we’ve been noisy for so long, and they’ve measured several times already, but there has been no movement. This time is like thunder and rain – sister?”

Chen Zilong watched Xiao Qian, who had just been calm, suddenly get emotional. She rushed to the calendar on the table, flipping through it, and then closed her eyes, as if recalling something.

“Sister?” Chen Zilong looked puzzledly at Xiao Qian.

Xiao Qian closed her eyes and suddenly opened them. She pushed Chen Zilong aside and strode out.

“Sister, where are you going?”

“I’m going out to do something, and I might be back late.”

Chen Zilong shrugged, “This must be going to see Brother Lang, right? So impatient right after coming home…”

But Xiao Qian wasn’t going to see Yu Minglang at all.

In her previous life, she recalls that on this day, she was battered and bruised by the scumbag and returned home to seek help from her family for a divorce. At that time, the village was also having a meeting, but the representative of the family was not Jia Xiufang but Chen Lin. Xiao Qian waited at home for half a day, and when Chen Lin came back with a pleased expression on his face and heard about her divorce, he immediately drove her out without any discussion.

At first, Xiao Qian didn’t know why her father was so eager to drive her away.

As she was leaving, she heard the neighbors discussing with joyful faces. Then she learned that the area was about to be demolished.

That means a house, money, and how much the family could get.

Chen Lin hid the university admission notice to save money for his son. After Xiao Qian’s marriage, she discovered that the bitch was homosexual and wanted a divorce, but Chen Lin wouldn’t allow it because he wanted to get money from the bitch to clean up his mess. Even when the house was about to be demolished, and the family got their money, Chen Lin still wouldn’t let Xiao Qian divorce because he was afraid of giving her a share of the family’s property.

If it was said that her marriage with the scumbag was filled with only indifference and violence, and it had already made her physically and mentally exhausted, then Chen Lin’s attitude was like the straw that broke the camel’s back. Unable to see a way out, Xiao Qian ultimately chose to end her life on this day in her previous life.

Walking on the same road as she did back then, she headed towards the place where she had jumped into the river.

Xiao Qian’s expression grew colder and colder.

All those things from her past were unbearable humiliations.

She couldn’t imagine how she could have been so wretched back then. Why couldn’t she be like her present self? Even if she wanted to die, she could blow up the scumbag and trash father along with her by hugging a gas tank.

That was truly the most innocent time when she had never thought of harming anyone before this day in her past life. However, no one had spared her either.

The river was already frozen, and only in the center of it was a hole. Xiao Qian didn’t know whether it was made by fishermen or people washing clothes. This side was not far from the Urban Village, and if anyone had a seriously ill elder at home, they would, according to custom, bring their clothes to wash in the river as well.

Xiao Qian stood by the river, looking at the hole with a cold smile and ice-cold eyes.

When treating others, she often used phrases like “embracing the wounded inner child” to help them confront the hidden, wounded child within. But she didn’t want to embrace her wounded child, even if it’s only a memory. All she could think of now was how the weak shouldn’t have it good.

If she hadn’t jumped in her previous life and met the person who saved her, changed her thoughts, and also changed her destiny, perhaps she would have already died in this freezing lake.

Even knowing that her thoughts were extremist, she didn’t want to change. Perhaps the kind-hearted child in her heart had long been frozen to death in this lake.

Who, born into this life, is a deep-thinking, unscrupulous person from the start?

But that’s the way the environment forces people to change, forcing her to metamorphose into the person she is now. Should she thank Chen Lin and the scumbag?

Nowadays, even thinking about these people disgusts Xiao Qian. Her purpose for coming here today is not to disgust herself, but to wait.

She’s waiting for the person who saved her in her previous life.

She wants to know who saved her and who changed her destiny.

In her past life, the person who saved her sat by her side in the hospital and talked to her for a while after the incident. Those words helped Xiao Qian get through a lot and also laid the foundation for her current character, in fact, Xiao Qian can no longer remember what the person looked like or what exactly they said, just the general meaning.

She once used the professional analysis that her excellent memory somehow only forgot her benefactor’s appearance. In the end, it was concluded that this memory loss could be the result of an avoidance reaction after the trauma. She felt that her most painful and vulnerable period was a humiliating period in her life and instinctively did not think about it, inadvertently blocking out the appearance of her benefactor as well.

Post-traumatic reactions can take two forms: some people hold onto the memory and even constantly experience “flashbacks” in their everyday lives, inserting frightening memories that lead to illusions, hallucinations, and dissociative disorders. On the contrary, Xiao Qian blocked that memory and did not want to recall it, hoping to face the difficulties of the past.

However, so far, she has not found a therapist who can treat her. She and Second Brother Yu have some similarities, both belonging to the category of exceptionally hard to hypnotize, having the strongest antitherapeutic abilities. It is frustrating for a therapist to seek treatment as no one has a stronger skillset them themselves.

Another few minutes and she would be able to see the one who saved her and face the vulnerability of her past life. Xiao Qian felt a bit excited.

Perhaps after addressing this issue, her Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder would be somewhat alleviated.

There was still some time before she jumped into the river in her previous life, so Xiao Qian stood by the river and waited.

Several people were setting up stalls by the river, as it was right by the entrance of a park and many children came to play during their vacation.

A young girl who seemed to be a student came over, promoting a card with a string to Xiao Qian.

“Sister, I am a student who works part-time. Would you buy a wish card? If you hang it on the tree, it can bring you good luck for a year.”

Xiao Qian looked behind the girl and saw a pine tree with a few cards fluttering in the wind.

It seemed that it was the same in her past life. She had bought one when she was feeling hopeless, but when she held the pen to write, her mind went blank, and she tied an empty one to the tree. This incident deepened her desire to die. That’s because she didn’t know what hope there was for living..


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