Chapter 42: Misunderstanding
But still, something was off between us.
There was an invisible barrier that I could sense. No matter how I tried to find reasons, I could not. Was it not normal for husband and wife to sleep together? By sleeping together, I did not mean just sleeping. But we did not do it again since our wedding night.
He had a lot of work to do and barely got out of his study. I had gone to visit him a few moments, but he seemed truly busy. So I stopped going there too lest I might disturb him.
And when it was bedtime, he would just hug me to sleep. I was too embarrassed to talk to him about it. No matter how I said it, we were married only for a month and I had known him for a month as well. We were not that intimate to talk about things like that. Even if I wanted, I could not just talk to him like that.
Other things were fine and I did not have any trouble in chatting with him, but when it came to intimate matters, I could never bring myself to start.
He would talk about intimate things shamelessly sometimes, but he never went over the line. The barrier that was between us never fell down. It was like he was preserving it. But why? Did I do something wrong? Or was he regretting marrying me?
It was true that I was just a human and I was powerless. But it was him who wanted to marry and brought me here. It was not like I proposed to him. If he wanted to be like this to me, then why did he bother to marry me in the first place?
I did not want to be distant from him. If things were going to be like this, I would rather not have him before it was too late. I just did not want to get hurt.
"Your Highness, are you feeling unwell? You don't look good at all," Ruby asked anxiously.
"I'm fine," I muttered. It was the same as always. Whenever someone would ask if I was doing okay, this was the answer I would give them. It was not like I could talk to them about my problem. Perhaps they would make fun of me or think that I was stupid to worry about things like that. But what could I do?
I was not experienced at all. I had never been in any relationship. And besides, I could not help but feel insecure about everything.
"Your Highness, please forgive my rudeness, but you can tell me if something is bothering you. I can try to help," she said. I could feel her sincerity in her words. Should I try to tell her?
"Actually, there is something that's bothering me. It's not a big deal, I know. I'm just overreacting perhaps," I muttered.
"Please tell me about it, Your Highness. I'll try my best to help," she said.
We were having some tea. I would get bored, so I would ask Ruby to have tea with me. She could make the best tea possible and because of her, I could not go a day without a cup of tea.
"Well, since... the wedding night, we... haven't done it," I mumbled.
"What?"
"I know it's not a big deal. I'm just..."
"Your Highness, what're you saying?" she asked as if she had fallen from the sky. "You mean, His Highness hasn't mated with you?"
"Perhaps he is tired..."
"No, Your Highness. His Highness hasn't been that busy these days. The busy days will start the next month as the other kings will visit each kingdom."
"What?"
"Yes, Your Highness. You two haven't fought, have you?"
"No, we haven't," I said. We had never fought, not even for once. It was true that we argued a lot, but that was about small matters. Those arguments occurred mostly because of our teasing each other though he teased me the most.
"Do you two kiss, Your Highness?"
"We haven't since that night."
I did not know how to approach him. I thought he would do it, but he never did. He kissed my forehead, cheek, or sometimes ears, but he did not kiss my lips.
"Your Highness, are you sure everything is alright?" she asked. It seemed like she was having a hard time breathing even talking about it. I had to admit it was an embarrassing topic to talk about, but the way she looked, it was like she was too shocked than embarrassed.
"Um... yes. You look like it's impossible not to make love in one month."
"It's true, Your Highness. I mean, it's not impossible, but it's too hard. Werewolves can't go many days without mating after they find their mate. It's quite painful too, Your Highness."
"But I don't feel any pain. I'm a bit frustrated about it, but I don't feel any pain," I said.
"That's because you're a human, Your Highness. But it's hard for werewolves. I don't get how His Highness is holding up."
"I don't understand. Can you please tell me a bit more clearly?"
"Well, when werewolves find their mates, they need to mate frequently. Or it becomes painful for them. And after a werewolf finds their mate, they can't mate with another werewolf. They must do it with their mate. And on a full moon, they just have to do it. Or it hurts like death," she explained.
It was scary. I had never heard of anything like this before. Then again, this was an unfamiliar world. There were more and more things to learn. But what surprised me more was that Dem could just tell me to do it with him. But he never for once mentioned it.
He was not like that. He was always straightforward with everything. But then why did he hide it from me? It was not like I did not want to do it with him. To be honest, I was kind of eager to do it as well.
"Then it means Dem is feeling some kind of pain, right?" I asked anxiously.
"Yes, Your Highness."
"What should I do now? I'm too embarrassed to tell him to do it with me. I mean, what if he doesn't want to do it with me anymore? What if I was so bad that night that he regrets..."
"Your Highness, His Highness chose you because of who you are, not how you're in bed. And I don't think it's anything like that. Your Highness, you said you met His Highness for the first time the day he brought you here, right?"
"That's true."
"Then what if His Highness is trying to be considerate of you? I mean, please forgive my rudeness, but His Highness is not someone who would be considerate of others, but when His Highness is with you, he shows a different side of him, Your Highness. His Highness must have felt that Your Highness doesn't want to mate, or His Highness might be forcing Your Highness."
Why did it not come to my mind before? Now that I thought about it, there was a possibility that it was the case. But what I suspected could be true too. The excitement I felt burnt down pretty quickly.
"Your Highness, you should talk to His Highness," she said. "In this way, all the misunderstandings will be solved."
"I... I'm just too embarrassed. How will I even start? What if he teases me again?"
"Your Highness, a moment's of embarrassment can solve a huge misunderstanding. You just have to let your heart out, Your Highness."
She was right. I did not need to be embarrassed now and even if I was, it did not matter. I needed to talk to him no matter what. Or the misunderstanding might continue. I did not want to have questions between us.
Honestly, I was very glad and grateful to have Ruby as my personal maid. If she was not there, I could not even imagine who would help me all this time. She was a bright person and also someone who I could rely on.
"You know what, I'll tell Dem to pay you double," I said.
"That would be great! Ahem... I mean, there is no need, Your Highness. It's just my duty and besides, I'm happy to help you," she said.
I chuckled. No wonder Dem chose someone like her as my personal maid. He perhaps knew we could rely on her.