BXBX NOVEL Chapter 55: Why Were You Sad For Me?
"Mmm," I mumbled. I was in his embrace with no place to move. Most of the times, he would leave before I even wake up. But sometimes, when I would wake up a bit earlier by accident, I would find myself in his embrace, though he never let me get up that early. He would make me sleep again, saying I needed rest.
"Go to sleep then. It's too early," he said and closed my eyelids with his palm.
"I had a weird dream," I said.
"What kind of dream?" he asked.
"I don't remember, but now I feel like a villain," I muttered.
"... Aren't we villains?"
"Wha... What?"
"Villains are better. You can do anything you want without thinking about the consequences. That's just perfect," he said. "You know, I would rather be a villain. And as my wife, it would be good if you're on the same team as me."
"You keep calling yourself villain... But you're not like that."
He laughed. "You're saying that because you haven't seen me at a battlefield. They say I kill werewolves like I kill bugs."
"But... in a battlefield, aren't you supposed to do so? You haven't gone there to party, right?"
"You're the only one who would put it like that," he said. "But I'm glad that you think so. And it doesn't matter if you feel like a villain. Sometimes, we have to be a villain to win."
His words felt weird. No matter what he said, I always found myself thinking about his words. I actually admired him in some ways. He knew the reality and always spoke the harsh truth. If he hid any of them from me, I would feel bad. But I was glad he did not think I was weak.
He kissed me on the lips suddenly. It was just a little peck, but even just from that, I turned into a red bean.
"Do you want to sleep, my wife?"
"Huh?"
"If you don't, we can go down to busi..."
"No! I'll sleep. I'm sleepy. Good night or morning, whatever," I muttered quickly.
He chuckled. I had my eyes closed. But I wanted to open them badly just to see him laugh. I heard from his mother that no one could make him laugh or smile. His lips barely twitched no matter what happened. But the man I was with was not like that at all.
He laughed and smiled freely.
Everyone said he was very cold and always shut himself down. He never even talked to anyone properly, let alone opening up. Yet since the beginning, he had been very gentle with me and never hesitated to answer any of my questions. Even Luc was surprised when he saw Demetrius talking freely.
Sometimes I wondered if he felt like he was being forced. Did he feel suffocated being the king? Whenever he was working, the smile or relaxed look on his face would leave without leaving a trace. It was weird. A smile was not necessary while working, but a strict and scary face like that was not fitting as well.
I never dared to ask him that. I was worried that he might hate it if I asked about something like that. Perhaps he did not want to talk about it. If I asked, maybe he would answer me even if he did not like talking about it. But I did not want the situation to go like that.
"You're not sleeping," he said.
"..."
"Stop pretending. I know you're awake," he said and tapped on my nose.
"Ow! I just..."
"What were you thinking about so intently? Your brows were furrowed," he said. "You looked cute though..."
"... What time is it?" I asked, avoiding his question.
"It's five in the morning," he answered. "But you're avoiding my question."
"N-No, it's not that."
"It's definitely that. You stuttered a bit."
"I was just... Well, I was thinking of going to meet Luc. So I was thinking about which time would be perfect," I said. I did not want to, but I had to lie. But perhaps it was for the best. If I met Luc, perhaps I would be able to know more about Dem.
I needed to know more about him to understand him better.
"You're not telling the truth, my wife. You're too bad at lying," he said while caressing my cheek. "But I know you have a reason for lying."
"I'm... I'm sorry. I shouldn't have..."
"My wife, why do I feel like you're sad about me? The way you looked at me the moment you opened your eyes- I saw sadness for a while. But that wasn't towards yourself, rather towards me. Why, my wife? Why were you sad for me?"
'Are you sure this necklace prevents you from reading my mind?'
"I... I..."
He sighed. "It's alright," he said. "You don't have to say anything. I understand that you're confused about my personality. It feels like there are two different persons when I'm with others and when I'm with you, right?"
I did not even know what to say. How did he even know that I was thinking about it? More importantly, I could not read the look in his eyes.
"I want to find the answer to that question as well. You know, I've been wondering all this time. Why am I like that with you? I never thought I would be able to smile freely. I never even thought of smiling. Smile and happiness were something kings aren't supposed to have.
But then why? When I'm with you, why do I feel happy? Every time you look at me, I feel different. It's like a heavy weight is lifted from my chest. Tell me why. I want to know too."
"Dem... you..."
"Yes, I feel that way. I really don't understand. I know you're confused too. Whenever you're near, there is a hard feeling in my chest. It hurts when you smile," he said and inched closer, "but I still want to suffer. I want to see your smile all the time."
His face got closer to mine. I closed my eyes in anticipation of the kiss that fell on my lips not long after.
His hand found my breast which he palmed patiently. His kiss was slow, his every move was slow- it was not a common thing for him. He was fast, not too fast, but he was never slow, not like this.
His lips left mine and I found myself facing the black eyes I always admired. "My lovely wife, the only one for me, if you find the answer, please let me know first. I wish to know what this is. And I want to hear it from you," he whispered in my ear while licking my earlobe, "since only you can see this side of me."
"Huh..."
"Won't you tell me, my wife?"
"Ah... y-yes, I-I will," I mumbled.
"That's good. You know, your scent drives me crazy," he said and took my nipple in his mouth.
"Mmm... uh..."
Suddenly there was a knock on the door. Ah, this was that he hated the most. I was kind of disappointed as well. Even though I was still shy about the whole thing, I hated it when we were interrupted.
"Those bastards! I will behead them all today!" he grumbled angrily.
"What are you saying? It must be something important," I said. "And... we can always do it later."
"Later, huh?"
Suddenly he grabbed the back of my neck and pulled me up. It was just a matter of seconds before I found him thrusting inside me suddenly.
"Dem!"
"I hate to delay. I hate it," he said and thrust forward.
"Ah! Dem, ahh!" I moaned. My mind was going blank again. I thought I was losing my mind until he kissed me again. Our tongues entwined and breathing matted, I wrapped my arms around him as if I needed to cling to him.
"You feel good, my darling wife," he said, breaking of the wet kiss. With the erotic sound and harsh breathing, everything felt weird. I should not make any sound or the knights who came for him might hear us, yet I could not stop myself.
How would I show my face to them later? But my thoughts kept getting tangled together and that was all because of him.
"Uhh! Huh... ah! Dem... nngh!"
"I hate to be apart from you, yet I have to fucking leave every single morning," he grumbled.
Even in the depth of pleasure, I could see the desperation in his eyes. For some reason, the question came to my mind- 'Does he wish to leave? Throw away the title and live a normal life?'
I did not know if it was possible, but even so, a smile curved on my lips. Because-
'So do I.'