BXBX NOVEL Chapter 66: You're Perfect
Though he was showing me some important papers, the mood from earlier had not changed yet and I was still embarrassed about the entire thing. We had done something lewd just a while ago and now he was showing me the paperwork. How funny!
"Your ears are all red, my wife. Is it because of me? Are you embarrassed?" he whispered into my ear. His warm breath tickled my ear. Weird... Everything was weird.
"I won\'t come here again," I mumbled.
"Why not?" he asked.
"You\'re such a bully. You always bully me," I said.
"But you like it, my dear wife," he kissed my ear. He always did this. Whenever he had the chance, he kissed my ear. It was as if it had become a habit of his. I did not understand him, or his behaviors. The more I tried to understand him, the more I fell into a hole.
And the hole kept swallowing me.
"Stop it," I said, trying to push him away. "What if someone comes in?"
"No one will come in, my wife. It\'s my study. Not just anyone can come in without permission," he said. "It\'s just you. Even my mother needs permission."
"Is it okay? I mean, we\'ve been together for a month..."
"We\'ve been together for a month and you\'ve known me for a month. But, my wife, it\'s not the same for me," he said. "I\'ve known you for seven years. I know what kind of person you are. And I trust you."
"... It\'s unfair."
"What is?"
"I... I don\'t understand why you\'re being this kind to me. I don\'t know what I\'ve done to deserve this. I was just a girl- an ordinary girl, but then suddenly you arrived. Everything changed in one night. And now, I\'ve become a queen all of a sudden.
I\'m cared for and spoiled. I can do everything I want and even if I just say that I like something, you bring it for me. And more importantly, I\'ve become the wife of someone like you... I don\'t know, I don\'t understand," I said. A tear fell from my eye. I did not want to cry, yet my chest felt heavy.
It was not sadness, rather pure happiness. It was so much that it was overflowing. "I just... I don\'t deserve this. Trust me, I\'ve done nothing good to deserve this."
"Shh... Don\'t ever say that again," he said and wiped the single tear with his thumb. He kneeled beside the chair and held my hands in his. "My wife deserves everything in this world and beyond this world. Who said you don\'t deserve it?"
"But I... I have been a coward. I\'ve blamed Maxen all the time for stopping me. But truth be told, I was a coward myself. If I truly wanted, I would have found a way out. If I was a little bit braver, I could be worthy of standing beside someone as mighty as you."
He squeezed my hands lightly. "You\'re perfect just the way you\'re. There is nothing you\'re lacking, my wife. Brave you say- you\'re the bravest woman I\'ve met. You\'ve kept up living even when you were going through such brutalities. Perhaps you had given up hopes that time, but I don\'t blame you.
Because you embraced the reality. My wife, not many people can do this. Do you know why humans get betrayed by fate?" he said. "That\'s because they can\'t accept reality. They stay in the maze of light of hope. Even if the light is just an illusion, they embrace it.
But you were brave enough to give that light up. You would rather live in the darkness than embrace the false desire of something like useless hope. And that\'s exactly what I like about you."
"We\'re the same after all. And that\'s why there is no one else for us. You\'re the only one who can be with me. And if someone else says that they are compatible enough to be with you, I\'ll just kill them. If anyone tried to take you away from me, no matter who they are, they will have to leave for hell a bit earlier than expected."
"You\'re brave, you\'re beautiful. Every part of you is perfect. I like your smile, your hair, your blue eyes, your white skin- I like everything about you. You\'re saying you\'re not worthy of being with me? And I think I\'m not good enough for you. But you know how I am, don\'t you?
I am greedy. Even if I don\'t deserve you, I want you. And if I want something, I have it till I get bored of it. Because I wanted you, I made you mine. And you\'ll forever be mine since I will never get bored of you. It\'s impossible, my wife.
No matter how much I look at you, every time my eyes fall on you, it\'s like I see someone new all over again. No matter how much I touch you, your skin feels new again and I crave you more. So rather than saying that we don\'t deserve each other, it\'s better to say that even if we don\'t deserve each other, let\'s be greedy. I don\'t care about morals. I don\'t believe that greed will lead you to your end.
I think my greed for you is one of the most valuable things. This greed will never fade away. Just like me, I want you to be greedy as well. Be greedy and get what you want. No one is stopping you and if someone tries, I\'m here, right? I\'ll rip them off.
So please, my wife, be greedy. Please take me by your greed. After all, it\'s not about what we deserve, it\'s all about what we get."
"You... You... I hate you," I forced my hand out of his grasp.
"You hate me?" he asked, looking hurt.
"You... You almost gave me a heart attack. No, an excessive dose of handsome attack. I almost died. And it\'s all your fault," I mumbled.
"Pfft, I didn\'t know my wife could make jokes like that," he said and tapped on my nose. "But what I said was true. Every single thing was true."
"... Thank you," I said. "You made me feel better, a lot better actually."
"Won\'t you smile then, my wife? I made you smile. So I deserve a smile of yours, don\'t I?"
I could not help but laugh. "You\'re really something..."
I was not perfect. No matter what he said, I could never be perfect. But if in his eyes, I was enough, then I did not need to be perfect anymore. After all, the only person I needed to accept me was him.
"I will leave now. You better go back to your work," I said, getting up. "I\'ve wasted a lot of your time."
"That\'s a lie, you and I both know it."
"Anyway, I\'ll go now. See you later."
"Okay, and I\'ll be late. I won\'t be able to have dinner with you. I have to go and check a few things. I\'ll come back before one though."
"I\'ll wait for you," I said.
"You don\'t have to. It will be late."
"It\'s pretty common for me to stay up until one. I\'ll wait for you even if you say no."
"Alright, but you have to bear the consequences as well."
"What consequences? You\'re not thinking of anything indecent, are you?" I asked cautiously. Knowing what kind of person he was, it was easy to guess what he was thinking. He always made an indecent meaning about every single thing. And he kept teasing me about it. It was hard to make a comeback as I was not good at saying these kinds of embarrassing things.
That was why he always got his way at these types of moments.
"I will fuck you."
"... That was pretty frank..."
"It\'s a deal then, right?" he smirked. "I know you like to make deals. So what do you think?"
"I will think about it," I said.
"It\'s not like you will have a choice. If I find you asleep, I will just wait for the morning. And if I find you awake, you and I both know what will happen, don\'t we?"
I blushed. I was trying to keep a straight face even if he was teasing. But I ended up getting all embarrassed again.
"... I will go now," I said and basically, ran out of there.
\'Ugh, it\'s so embarrassing. That shameless man...\'
I could not believe I did not hate him talking like that. I did not enjoy it, but I did not hate it either. Was I considered a pervert because of this?