My Mother Has a System but Won't Use It

"I like being around all of you." Han Li began. "Or I wouldn't have bothered with all this. I do trust all of you to a high degree. And don't pull that 'I am looking at an idiot' look on me, Ruo; I get what you mean about my own issues and why I can't have blind trust; we'll discuss that later."

Many nodded while Ruo blinked. Her eyes changed into one saying: Maybe not that stupid in the end.

"To begin with, let me get you on track with this. I don't plan to buy your affection with a bond that states you could never leave my side—I am selfish when thinking about you bunch, but not to that degree. If you don't like me, you can leave at any moment, but just, you will have to keep your mouth shut about anything that you learn from us."

Most took the words in stride, but Hua Feilan was obviously a bit uncomfortable.

Was Han Li saying that he considered her as his own, too? Did his 'I am selfish when thinking about you bunch' include her?

Han Li noticed her dilemma, but he didn't address it.

"I don't wish to snatch away your free will. That's a sacred thing. If you are uncomfortable and don't want to see my face, you can leave at any point. But regardless, never do something that is a fundamental betrayal against me and my people.

"We won't do anything that is fundamentally against your existence either. As in, if we plan something and you would have to lose your life to accomplish it—we will re-consider.

"This is as much as I want out of this promise, and those who are against it may leave. Now. You don't have to consider my feelings or any of the others. Think of only yourselves and do whatever you want to do.

"I don't really wish to be your chains. If I can, I wish to be your wings. So that's my cue, and if you are against it—you may leave. That's it."

The first to raise their hands was Ruo.

"I am against it. Not really. I do wish to be a part of this whole secret thing, but I am not one of your women. So how does that work? Is it solely for your harem?"

She admired Han Li, as he had always been one of the few from whom she always had something new to learn. Han Li was an enigma to her, and his interest in her was as plain as daylight.

Ruo knew he loved her—he was really passionate about her.

His eyes always had a different shine when he looked at her. She could read the room.

He had never refused any of her requests. He had never kicked her into any cold pond like he had done all the others in the room, even though she, too, was practically one of his disciples, too.

Han Li treated her differently. As if she was a delicate doll that could break easily.

She respected him, but that was respect. She was not interested in becoming one of his harem members.

She felt no interest in what a relationship represented in the first place.

It never even crossed her mind when she was not faced with the prospect of a relationship like now, where she was in a room full of His women.

She might have been a bit interested in trying the feeling out if he was looking straight at her; he was always looking past her at something she was not.

Han Li was always looking at her with so much guilt that it practically made interacting with him a bit of a chore.

As Monk Hen Shin had said often, she should rather walk around and enjoy the mountains instead of spending time with a person who was obviously not even looking at 'her' but an image of 'her' that he seemed to have.

Han Li sighed, looking at Ruo. He could read her thoughts in her eyes.

His guilt was like smoke; it was in his heart, but Ruo had no memories of why it would be pointed at her. Like thorns stuck deep in the throat, he couldn't really push aside the feelings.

Ruo was a person who was with him at his lowest. She had seen him as her everything. She and his Mother were his worlds—until his mother died of her lifespan shortage, and Ruo was played into suicide.

If she regained her memories, how would she look at him at this moment?

Probably with teasing warmness. She was not that different from the Ruo at this moment, but they were also subtly and profoundly different. It boggled him how memories were what made a person.

Wasn't he his memories, too?

Wasn't memories what made a person who they are?

He could see everyone's Existence. An Existence itself was basically a bundle of memories that created the soul of a person. It was—themselves.

Was he expecting Ruo to be the same as the Ruo of the past timeline… Is it just impossible..?

This life's Ruo had a different life after all. Her memories were different. She was even half a monk.

In his past life, he and Ruo had been like siblings under the care of Yue Li as they grew up. In this life, he was the most mature one, and he was the one caring for them all—his own mother included.

He smiled despite himself and cleared Ruo's doubt.

"Of course, you don't have to see me as the central field of how everything worked. What I am trying to build here at this moment, at least, is not just for my harem. I plan to build a community—a Sect."