The Best Director

Countless movie fans who logged onto YOUTUBE, clicked on the “The Surprise I gave My Wife for Halloween” comedy video on the homepage and began watching with interest. The Best Director is the Best Director after all; even his home prank videos seemed almost professional. The short video started with a subtitle introduction “Before Halloween” which was followed by a secret rendezvous, much to the amusement of chainsaw enthusiasts, who were delighted to spot the two “fathers of the chainsaw” making cameo appearances.

Inside the studio on the screen, James Wan and Leigh Whannell greeted Wang Yang with a high-five and a hug. Wearing a baseball cap and large sunglasses, he was dressed very mysteriously and inconspicuously. James Wan solemnly handed Wang Yang a black plastic bag he was holding: “Everything’s ready!” Leigh Whannell said seriously: “All went smooth, wasn’t discovered by the prop department, nobody noticed.” Wang Yang opened the plastic bag, reached in, and pulled out a prop severed hand that was eerily realistic, laughing toward the DV camera: “Ohoho, it’s so cool!”

He placed the wedding ring from his left hand next to the one worn on the severed hand, appearing identical, and chuckled, “Just don’t tell the old saw man, I don’t want to get caught.” James Wan and Whannell nodded: “Don’t worry about it.” Wang Yang made the iconic Star Trek Vulcan salute with his left hand: “Live long and prosper.” The two fathers of the chainsaw responded with the same gesture: “Live long and prosper.”

“He really is interesting.” Countless movie fans couldn’t help but chuckle, even getting a glimpse of The Big Bang Theory bloopers. Natalie chuckled watching the video; she knew he would post something like this on YOUTUBE after its launch. Coming here, sure enough, there was a video flaunting their affection, so to say, she really hated this guy.

“On Halloween night…” After the subtitle flashed past, a quick montage showed Wang Yang making preparations: pouring red liquid into a wash basin, placing the severed hand in the refrigerator. He “shushed” the DV camera with a mischievous smile, then carefully hid. The lighting atmosphere was like Paranormal Activity as Jessica walked into the dining room, noticed the dripping faucet in the wash basin, opened the fridge, and quickly, amid the laughter of video viewers, Wang Yang burst out. She screamed in a collapsing panic: “Aaaaahhh—”

“Hahaha! Jessie, Jessie…” Wang Yang walked towards her, laughing wildly, staggering and raising his left hand. The angle switched to the front of the fridge to show Jessica standing stock-still with eyes wide open, hands covering her mouth: “Oh my God, oh my God! You, you…”

The video’s main content ended there, but the slow-motion replay that followed showed Jessica, at the very moment when Wang Yang screamed and dashed out, leaping up as if electrocuted, capturing the vivid detail of someone’s physical reaction to being startled, followed by a comical turn and flailing fists.

“Haha!” Watching this video, it was hard for movie fans not to laugh heartily at its freshness and humor, unless they disliked Wang Yang and Jessica. A warm-up for Paranormal Activity 3!? Evelyn couldn’t help thinking, if she had such a prank-loving boyfriend, she might be scared to death, but this was just too funny! Numerous people felt they got to know something more amazing about Yang, seeing what he was like in real life.

Celebrities normally dared not, and indeed did not, randomly upload personal videos on the internet, firstly due to image concerns, such as makeup, lighting, cinematography, color correction, resolution, and so on… There often could be a significant difference between appearance in front of and behind the camera. If a homely, unmade-up visage did not match the “image” and was shown in such a funny way, wouldn’t it be like shooting yourself in the foot? Furthermore, a poor reaction could easily provoke the mockery and jokes of the gossip media, leading to unpleasant comments. And besides, being in front of cameras and paparazzi’s lenses every day was enough; they weren’t interested in more.

Wang Yang, however, clearly never worried about these concerns, saying early on “I’ve never considered myself a Hollywood star.” Not only was he interested, he was the initiator. Of course, no image was harmed, Jessica’s bare face remained sweet and charming, less sensual but more authentic. The entire process of her being startled was charmingly naive and interesting. Once the video was uploaded, the views began to surge, breaking through 30,000 views by the afternoon, and naturally, the number of comments kept growing.

“Amazing Yang, do you guys do this often? It’s so interesting, looking forward to seeing more!” User Evelyn commented. User Palmer was a bit skeptical: “Is this for real? You guys aren’t acting, right?” Bad Candy said: “Hilarious! If you raised the middle finger on the severed hand, would it be even scarier?” While laughing, Alina asked, “I almost fell over laughing! Is there a simpler way to scare someone? I don’t have these movie props, but I want to scare my boyfriend!”…

“Ah!” In the elegant study, Jessica screamed in surprise, “Didn’t I tell you not to upload this?” Wang Yang, sitting in the chair, scrolled through the comments, laughing and covering his cheeks, and looked up at her, “What’s the big deal, it’s not like it’s a sex tape like Paris Hilton’s.” Jessica gritted her teeth and said, “If it were, I’d kill you, but in this one, I’m wearing pajamas!” Wang Yang shrugged innocently, “I don’t understand, it’s a Paul Frank monkey, do you wear a spacesuit to the beach? Ha ha!”

“It’s not the same! Totally different…” Jessica took a deep breath, knowing she couldn’t win against him, and angrily reached out to slap him in the face, shouting, “What’s the big deal? Keep laughing, just you wait!”

Soon on YOUTUBE, a user named JESSNG uploaded a funny category video titled “How I Wake Up My Husband Every Day,” and many tourists and visitors clicking through various videos came in, a revenge from Jessica! There was no professional complex editing, just continuous DV footage, and in the video window was a warm and spacious bedroom, the camera panning over an MP3 player, a speaker, and other items, rising to the face of the person holding the camera, Jessica, who smiled and greeted, “HELLO.”

The camera then suddenly focused on the bed, where Wang Yang slept soundly under a blanket, when suddenly “boom boom boom boom” sounds like explosions echoed through the bedroom, and the pajama-clad Wang Yang rolled out of the bed and hit the floor, then jumped up, looking around bewilderedly and shouting, “Damn it! What’s going on!?”

“Hahaha!” Then Jessica’s triumphant laughter was heard, shaking with mirth, “Hahaha!” The camera continued to shake with her laughter, and there was Wang Yang, looking utterly embarrassed, staring with furious eyes as he charged out; the video ended amidst her laughter.

The clicks skyrocketed, breaking a thousand, then ten thousand, and the video of not even a minute in length was just as hilarious! Alina finally knew how to scare her boyfriend easily and simply, Jessica is so mean! Evelyn watched it over and over again, laughing until her stomach hurt, not expecting that the amazing Yang who had nearly scared her to death was made to look so pitiable, taking such a heavy fall! This time, Palmer had no doubts that Wang Yang wasn’t acting, because that kind of genuine reaction was too seamless.

“Haha! Every day… how interesting.” Natalie also laughed hysterically for a while before she could stop, it looks like married life is very happy! Indeed, love and marriage are still worth pursuing. She suddenly exclaimed, pausing the video where Wang Yang was sound asleep, lying on his side with his head on a pillow, and giggled, “He looks so cute when he’s asleep, just like Charlie.” She left a comment after finishing the video and then went to look for other videos to watch.

“GOOD!” Wang Yang bit his teeth in itchiness, revenge, huh? Be careful of a husband’s wrath! He opened a folder and selected a “How I Greet My Wife” for upload, a compilation of the oldest tricks in the book, all scary screams from behind.

After the weekend, Monday came, and YOUTUBE’s first day of operation was a resounding success, growing faster than Wang Yang, Chen Shijun, and others had expected, and it seemed like there would be no problem launching the Firefly promotional plan at any time. On the first day, there were 300,000 registered users, over 90,000 videos uploaded to the site, and 3 million video views, almost causing the servers to crash from the overwhelming traffic – fortunately, that didn’t happen! People’s enthusiasm for sharing videos was barely contained.

Such an achievement, of course, could not be achieved without Showyourself, the war of words, and the epic husband-and-wife battle between Wang Yang and Jessica. Both uploaded 4 videos each under the usernames YOUNGNG and JESSNG, both scaring and teasing each other to near-collapse! The 8 videos contributed to nearly 1.3 million clicks, with “How I Wake Up My Husband Every Day” reaching a staggering 320,000 views, becoming YOUTUBE’s traffic champion on its first day of operation.

Was this a promotional stunt? Why weren’t Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston, or other celebrity couples or spouses, seen doing such publicity stunts? Apart from their image, after they divorced or broke up, all these would become embarrassing. With a cast like the magical Yang and Jessica, movie fans and followers knew it didn’t need any publicity stunts, they welcomed this kind of video very much, real funny clips of stars and celebrities that were neither reality TV shows nor talk shows, but intimate DV footage that let people see a bit of their everyday life, their genuine side.

Clearly, this was extremely helpful for their popularity; Yang & Jessica, whose relationship was so stable and sweet, from being lovers to being spouses, had no bad scandals, which made them “mundane” and gradually attracted less attention. But on the 5th, 6th, and 7th, as YOUTUBE exploded in popularity, and with the total views of the battle videos soaring over 3 million and then 5 million, their popularity suddenly shot up, making them quickly rise as hot search terms on Google, even overshadowing Pitt & Aniston & Jolie’s limelight, no doubt, the magical Yang suddenly once again became an influential figure.

If we speak of ascending to stardom and boosting popularity through web videos, then Pokémon and Sweetheart Angel have blazed the trail.

“Yang and Jessica’s Eight Funny Shorts Showcase Bliss,” “Yang and Jessica’s Hilarious Shorts Hit Over Five Million Views,” “Yang and Jessica Redefine the Meaning of Love,” “The Magical Yangs Reveal Their Pajama Styles, Corny Yet Adorable”…

The myriad of entertainment media naturally did not overlook this news; the ongoing popularity of the shorts was also fueled by their coverage—from celebrity gossip websites to Yahoo Entertainment to America Online, and it even caught the attention of numerous overseas entertainment media. Such as the Chinese portals Sina, NetEase, and Sohu that closely follow the Magical Yangs wouldn’t miss out. With the support of countless fans from around the globe, YouTube’s traffic surged as well.

The old husband-and-wife battle was started partly for fun, but Yang’s underlying intention was to lead by example, to spur interest and courage in America’s and the world’s youths, encouraging them to pick up cameras like DVs and create their own interesting videos. It’s not necessary to go to great lengths—filming hilarious moments from parties is good enough. Of course, a little creativity is needed for those seeking higher view counts. Uploading to YouTube aids in promoting video sharing.

Now, with his sudden surge in individual popularity, associated blogs and personal websites have reached a period of explosive attention. Wang Yang was happy to see this happen as it was beneficial for “Firefly.”

Mark Cuban made no comment on YouTube’s explosive launch, but other IT industry media analyzed and reported that video-sharing websites needed to find more ways to profit beyond advertising. Otherwise, high popularity might be coupled with high losses. Bandwidth, copyright, and operational costs could consume a vast amount of money, and the more popular the site became, the more astronomical the numbers would get. Unless a large company took over and continued to burn cash, Yahoo jokingly said, “The Magical Yang might have to make a few more movies each year to afford this housewife.”

In reality, Wang Yang was far from a qualified businessman. Even if it required taking one billion US Dollars a year to fill YouTube’s coffers in a few years, he wouldn’t mind at all. After all, the media impact YouTube provided to Flame Films was immeasurable! The whole world now had a video paradise—how great was that! But one billion US Dollars a year couldn’t just appear out of thin air; Flame Films had to strive to make each movie even better.

Although the week wasn’t over yet, “National Treasure,” “The Polar Express,” and “Christmas Escape” had already secured the top three spots on the box office chart for December 3-9. The newly released “Stealing Heart” grossed 9.48 million at 476 theaters in six days, with a 7.4 IMDB rating, 68%/74% freshness, and 80% likeability. The actors’ performances, especially Natalie Portman and Clive Owen’s, received the highest praise. There were some compliments for the screenplay, but the film wasn’t raved about too much, and the media and fans knew that it was yet another movie that only served to highlight the actors.

As time inched closer to the new weekend of December 10, “The Aviator: Power, Money, and Madness” was set to release on a large scale.

Flame Films, as a user, had already uploaded trailers for “Mr. Hughes 2” and “Crash” to YouTube, with the trailer for “Mr. Hughes 2” occupying a prominent position in the homepage entertainment movie category. There were also numerous behind-the-scenes snippets, interviews with creators like Christopher Nolan and Jim Carrey, and other videos, attracting many movie fans. Before YouTube was launched, Flame Films easily reached a licensing agreement with it, providing trailers, bloopers, and a library of the first 50 complete movies and TV shows—though the sales revenue was far less than even “Veggie Baby Adventures.”

The promotion for “Mr. Hughes 2” naturally wasn’t limited to online videos only. Flame Films had high hopes for this biographical film with a production budget of one hundred million US Dollars, aiming for awards season and a global box office of 250 million! However, it’s hard for biopics to have any outstanding viral marketing. With the promotional experience from “The Aviator,” the Flame Films distribution team focused on TV spots, outdoor advertising, film festivals, and other channels. Making the movie known as “Oscar-worthy” was a big boost to the box office. Now, the goal had been achieved, and all that was left was its opening in 2,730 theaters and its expected appearance on the Golden Globe nominations list on the 13th.

An amusing incident occurred: the enigmatic Wang Yang, who had been quiet for days, suddenly uploaded a video to YOUTUBE entitled “Paranormal Activity Version of ‘Firefly’ Preview.” Movie fans and enthusiasts opened it out of curiosity, only to burst into laughter. What was this, some promotion for “Paranormal Activity 3”?

“You must know one thing, she is a very dangerous person, and she holds some secrets that you shouldn’t know about…” Fast-paced suspenseful music, the deep voice of Heath Ledger, and the sinister horror of the “Paranormal Activity” DV footage made this parody preview exceptionally eerie and surprisingly effective. The video window flashed scenes of Rachel McAdams staring dazedly into the mirror, shivering all over, then cut to Zachary Levi lowering his head and glancing at the DV camera, “Are you talking about the predator?” The intense music clunked, and the screen suddenly went black: FROM, YOUNG-WANG

Meanwhile, the eight funny videos featuring Wang Yang vs. Jessica had already surpassed 7 million total views.

It was nightfall, and the birthplace of the most popular “How I Wake My Husband Up Every Day” was now tender and warm. In the dimly lit bedroom, the couple lay in bed, facing each other on their sides, silently communicating with their eyes, playfully stroking each other’s hair and caressing faces, laughing from time to time.

All that quarreling, all that tension, was just flirtation. After all these years of growing up and influencing each other, they still harbored an easily ignitable love. They simply couldn’t conceive of a “break-up,” nor could they imagine what life without each other would be like. Next year would be the legendary “seven-year itch.” Wang Yang actually was curious as to how he would “itch”, since she had been with him since he had almost nothing, giving him everything…

“Hehe.” Feeling the intensity in his eyes, Jessica suddenly laughed. After all these years together, from friends to girlfriend, from girlfriend to wife, and then… it was time! Her hand slowly reached toward a certain place. Her gaze grew seductive as she leaned closer, breathing softly like an orchid and said, “Let’s make a baby, it’s time for me now.” Wang Yang laughed and said, “I know.” For years, he had been more aware of her safe days, friend days, and ovulation days than she was.

After kissing her, he sadly patted her cheek, “But we can’t, your recovery isn’t even half a year along yet.” Jessica immediately let out a dejected “Ah,” her pretty face scrunching into a frown, “I’m going crazy! Let’s do it, it’ll be fine, I’m sure it will. I know my body best, let’s do it, I want to be a mom, let’s do it, let’s do it!” She quickly pleaded while seeming like she was about to commit marital rape, pouncing on him and teasing, “Let’s do it, let’s do it! I promise it’ll be okay, I promise!”

If there were no reaction or desire, divorce wouldn’t be far off, so Wang Yang strove to suppress the turmoil in his heart. He pulled her back to her original position, shaking his head and smiling, “I really admire you. Watching ‘Desperate Housewives’ and ‘Stealing Heart’, aren’t you scared?”

“Haha!” Jessica laughed heartily, the leading lady from “Stealing Heart” wants to have a baby with him, huh? Naïve and innocent as ever, she believed that even if every marriage in the world failed, it wouldn’t happen to her and this fool. She ignored his joking and launched another assault, “COME-ON! I need you, COME-ON!” Wang Yang sat up, searching for condoms in the bedside drawer while asserting in no uncertain terms, “A few more months! Why are you so willful?”

A few more months? She might as well be dead! Jessica pouted defiantly, yanking the quilt over her head, “Then in a few more months, you can touch me.”

“Hey!” Wang Yang exhaled helplessly, glanced at her, and then at the already opened condom in his hand, shrugging, “It’s already unwrapped, it would be a waste not to finish this battle. We need to be eco-friendly, no wasting.” Jessica burst out laughing, then pretended to be muffled again, “Sorry, I’m not an environmentalist.” Wang Yang suddenly threw off the quilt, “But I am, doesn’t matter any more, the battle begins!”…(