Chapter 184 - It's Okay To Be Selfish Sometimes
Alexander smiled through the tears when Felicity kissed the side of his head. He had his head bowed and kept his eyes glued to the pictures. Felicity enveloped his face with her palms and forced him to look at her. Wiping his tears, she shook her head, commanding him not to cry.
"It\'s not your fault, Alexander," Felicity stated as if she had read his thoughts.
Whenever he turned back and looked at his past, not a single moment had gone when he had not found himself guilty by remembering Hera. He had failed to keep his promise to Mariana and couldn\'t protect Hera. In the end, Alexander had lost her no matter how sincerely he tried.
"Of course, it\'s my fault, Felci. I sent her away because I thought I was going to die. You said it wasn\'t the time to be selfish. It was time for sacrifice, but I selfishly chose to return without her because I was frightened of losing you.. I was so desperate to come back to you," Alexander confessed, tears now streaming down his cheeks in a steady flow.
"No, Alexander, you sent her away because you thought we were both dying. You did it to protect her. You weren\'t selfish," Felicity begged to differ as she thought she was at fault. "You came back to save my life because I couldn\'t stay safe as I promised. I\'m sorry, we lost her because of me. It wasn\'t your fault," she argued, trying her best to reduce the burden of his guilt.
"If only you stayed back with Hera," Felicity was saying, her voice breaking into a sob. Alexander turned to face her and shook his head frantically. His tear-filled red eyes glared at her in disagreement.
"Don\'t ever say that, angel. How could I have not come to you? If I had the chance to go back in time and change the past, I would still choose you. If it\'s Junior instead of Hera, I would have still chosen you over him," Alexander said without any hesitation. If Alexander hadn\'t come back to Felicity, Hera would have been with him. He wouldn\'t have to feel guilty that he failed in keeping his word given to Mariana.
But would he have survived if he had lost his Felicity?
"I know Hera is alive, and I\'ll find and bring her home sooner or later. But If I had let you die, I would have lost everything. Without you, nothing has any meaning in life. I exist because you\'re here with me, angel. Junior and Hera exist because of you. This family and we all mean nothing without you," Alexander confessed without any second thoughts, his voice filled with conviction.
"Then stop blaming yourself. Believe me, Alexander, I would have done the same if I was in your place. I would choose you over everything. It\'s okay to be selfish sometimes," Felicity said, pulling him into her embrace. She let him cry over her shoulder until his pain and guilt subsided while she silently wept along with him.
They spent their early-morning hours reminiscing their happy memories with Hera. They had captured every little movement of baby Hera in those photographs. Hera\'s smile, her toothless grin, the transparent teardrops running over her chubby cheeks, every little thing provided them immense comfort.
Felicity\'s fingers grazed over the picture, caressing baby Hera\'s tiny form playing on their huge bed. A wide toothless grin danced on her rosebud lips while she held her toes with her hands. Felicity remembered how little Hera giggled at Alexander when he blew raspberries, and she had captured the beautiful moment in her camera.
Both Felicity and Alexander took a trip down memory lane together as another photo sequence in the album compelled them to relive those moments.
Felicity\'s little trouble maker puffed out his chubby cheeks and pouted in anger while his hands crossed over his chest.
"I don\'t want her in our picture," little Hunter said. Felicity sighed in exhaustion for the ninth time. Her boy had been so bitter ever since they brought Hera home. She could understand it made him insecure to suddenly have a sibling and share his parents\' love with her. It wouldn\'t be easy to accept a new member into a family all of a sudden.
But it had been more than six months, and he still didn\'t accept her as his sibling.
"Sweetheart, you shouldn\'t say that about your little sister. It\'s a family picture, and we have to include her because she\'s part of our family now," Felicity said, her voice sweet as honey. But like every other time, it didn\'t work on her little boy. He was too clever for his age to get his mind manipulated by someone.
"No, she\'s not part of my family. Stop lying, Mom. She\'s not my sister," the little boy yelled in anger. It was hard to understand because of his lisp when he spoke too fast.
Felicity was shocked to hear her little boy speak so rudely.
It was getting worse day by day. In the beginning, he used to argue that Hera couldn\'t be his sister because she didn\'t look like him or his parents. He would adamantly hold on to the fact that Hera\'s eyes were blue when none of his family members had blue eyes.
Alexander would point out that even Hunter didn\'t have his parents\' eyes. But the little devil was too intelligent, and he would fire back, saying he inherited his grandma\'s purple eyes, which Hera didn\'t.
As the time passed and the blue eyes Hera was born with started to change into its permanent colour, it became easy to make him shut up as Hera\'s eyes matched the shade of Alexander\'s perfectly.
"Look at her eyes, Junior. They match mine perfectly," Alexander said, showing how Hera inherited his green eyes. "Hence proved she\'s your sister," he said with a broad grin on his lips. He was trying to distract him, but all in vain.
"That\'s because she\'s a witch. She has changed her eye colour by magic. She knows sorcery, Dad," little Hunter said, glaring at Hera.
"Enough," Felicity shouted, startling both her son and her husband. "Who\'s teaching you all these big words? Where did you learn it from?" She asked her son. "Oh, see, now you\'re shouting at me because of her. You never did that before, Mom," Hunter said, throwing his shoes in different directions.
Felicity exhaled through her mouth in frustration. She had had enough of his tantrums.
"Behave, or I\'m grounding you, little boy," she warned.
"You don\'t like me now," Hunter announced with a sad pout. Alexander noticed tears in his eyes. "She\'s not even your real daughter, and you\'re getting cross with me because of her. I hate her," he said, finally showing his tears to his mother.
"How do you know she\'s not my real daughter? Who\'s filling all this dirt in your brain?" Felicity asked while Alexander signalled her not to get angry. He placed Hera in the crib and beckoned Hunter to come to him. The soft smile and the affection filled in his gaze won over, and their little boy hesitatingly followed his request.
"Come here, Junior," Alexander carried his son in his arms and wiped the trace of tears from his fat cheeks before kissing them. "Why don\'t you like her? She\'s so tiny and so cute. You can play with her all the time and become best friends with her. You two can have so much fun together," Alexander said, trying to win his little boy\'s heart.
Little Hunter frowned, shaking his head in rejection.
"I don\'t need her because I already have a special friend and my girlfriend is strong and brave. Do you know she beats me in the running race? And she always beats Eric in arm wrestling," Hunter shared with his father. Pride oozed out of his tone while his eyes shone in amazement. Alexander smiled because his boy sounded so adorable when he spoke in a lisp.
Meanwhile, Felicity\'s jaw dropped as she gawked at her husband in shock.
"He has a girlfriend? Why didn\'t I know this? Who is she? How, when and where did he meet her?" She asked. Her every question was aimed at her husband while her green eyes glared daggers at him as though she was the investigating officer and he was the guilty culprit. Alexander rolled his eyes at her overdramatic response.
"I\'m so sorry he\'s bringing a bride home without your approval, and you didn\'t get an invite to his wedding," Alexander said sarcastically. Felicity scowled in return, fixing him with a dirty look while the daggers in her eyes sharpened even more.
Felicity was clueless about her son\'s female friends. Her boy had always been shy with girls, and he would run and hide behind his mother\'s tall frame whenever a girl looked at him for more than a second, let alone speak to him. So it came off as a shock when Hunter admitted he had a female friend.